Submitted by ub on Tue, 04/17/2012 - 18:38

If you've ever wondered about the best way to write an email to a woman you met, you're not alone. The key to writing a great email is to be confident and engaging, but there are three major pitfalls that even successful daters often forget to avoid. Men should know the best way to write a text or email to a woman. Here are some mistakes to stay clear away.

Do not ask a woman, “May I have your number?”

Of course we need to get a woman’s phone number sooner or later if things are going well, but the problem with the above question is that we are asking for it as if we need permission. We need to assume she will say yes no matter what. If things are going well, don’t ask, tell her to give it to you.

Instead, end the email with something similar to, “Well you seem like an interesting girl. I wouldn’t mind meeting up for a drink sometime. Hit me up with your phone number and I’ll give you a call this week.”

Now you are no longer asking or trying to live up to her, you are calling the shots and you are the one in control. This puts you in a position of high power and makes you appear to be the alpha male that girls are naturally attracted to you.

Asking reeks of desperation and weakness. Telling shows confidence and builds attraction.

Asking “Do you want to go out to dinner sometime?”

Again, this hits on all of the mistakes listed above. Also, dinner dates are very unoriginal. Most women have been on dozens of dinner dates that clearly have not worked out. Psychologically, you are placing yourself in the same boring category as her last ten dates before you have even met.

In addition, paying for an expensive dinner also comes across as if you are desperate, and trying to earn her approval. We should not have to buy her feelings for us. This is what guys who are desperate to be liked do. Love should come naturally, not through how much money we shell out.

Finally, dinner dates create a lot of distance between you and your date. It is very hard to touch each other and communicate with your bodies. When this happens, it is very easy to fall into the “friend” category, which often happens after a dinner date. Going in for the first kiss will feel awkward at the end of the night if there has been no previous touching.

Ever have a great date full of great conversation and no pick up when you call for a second date? Odds are the above reason is why.

Overdoing it, or going overboard with compliments.

Many guys eventually get so great at emailing that they start to receive tons of flattering compliments from females. This should happen all the time once you get experienced at presenting yourself in the right way.

However, don’t make the mistake of responding with comments like, “I really like you,” “You seem great,” or “I think we’d be a perfect match.”

Even if they are doing it first, saying it back ends the chase and kills tons of attraction. Women can be very quick to change their emotions. You must not fall into this trap!