Dedicated to the one I love, my wife, family, friends, and those who are reading #CityImages - A daily dedication.
To be loved. It can be abstract. It can be the act of snuggling. Saying the words “I love you.” Or knowing they’re felt. It’s about showing up and comforting people. Or allowing them to help themselves.
But even when we have loving relationships, we can get so familiar with them that we forget to notice. Allow for some enchantment and fondness. Small still matters.
To be understood. When people’s opinions of us clash with how we want to be seen, we feel alienated and isolated. But to be understood by others, we must first understand ourselves.
Think of your signature, the mark that makes you who you are internally and in what you show the world. Wherever you go, whatever you do, there’s a thread of continuity. Never stop thinking about what it means to be you. It’s a lifelong pursuit.
To have control. There are times when the desire for power is beautiful and life-enhancing. But when our longing for power is an attempt to compensate for a lifelong deficit, we can zigzag between swelling visions of glory and crushing despair.
Embrace flexibility and moderation. Power isn’t about control over others; it is about authenticity and authority. Stepping into your power can be your way of claiming adulthood and taking responsibility for your choices.
To show we care. I haven’t looked into my children's or grandkids' eyes for a long time, I’ve been busy working all my life, and I forgot to notice these beautiful creatures I helped create.
More and more, noticing children helps them feel less wounded. Attending to them in a deep, attuned way healed something for her. By really seeing, and feeling less deprived.
To feel more fulfilled, make a point of concentrating on an activity or topic that matters to someone you love.
To have freedom. For a young person, freedom might mean not having a curfew. For an adult, it might mean setting your work hours.
Ask yourself what kind of freedom you want. The freedom we pursued when we were 20 isn’t necessarily the same freedom that’s available at 60. Adjust the terms and conditions of your commitments.
To create. If we insist, we can have creative moments every day by observing and being curious.
Express yourself imperfectly. Change your point of view about an issue. Take in something new and let out something personal. Experience something fresh.
To belong. If you can feel comfortable being all you are, you can experience not belonging with more ease, even with delight at times.
It’s about being secure in all that you are, even the awkward, clumsy, oddball moments — especially those moments! If you’re just trying to fit in, you will miss out on truly belonging.
To win. I’m delighted with myself. I did brilliantly. Well done, me. I see that I’m skilled at doing this, and I have done an excellent job,” a friend once said to me. This feels like a win. Consider what “winning” means to you. The definition changes and the rules vary. Honor your successes, however small.
To connect. If you’re carrying trauma, shame, or a source of pain, it takes courage to open up and be vulnerable with someone. But when you feel safe and comfortable, revealing something private can bring you to a place of acceptance. We form connections by creating trust and opening ourselves up.
LEAN ON ME - #CIMAGES.ME
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